Thursday, December 09, 2004

Bird prefer Orange Popsicles 03.30.03

Just a few random things.

My stomach sticks out over my jeans, now. In all of my 29 years this has never happened. I have never felt the sensation of gut over pants.

I mean, it's to the point if I am sitting down my belt actually restricts some of my bodies natural functions. I am going to become that guy who has to take his fucking belt off after a meal so he can properly digest his food.

Shit, this is what quitting smoking is doing. I can feel my metabolism slowing down. Cigarettes kept me young, and now I can feel the slowing, the cellular death. I should have kept on the path of lung cancer, at least I would have died without the gut, before even knowing about the gut. It's too late, now.

I guess I could do some sit-ups...or Pilates. Oh, yeah...'Pilates', seriously, what is going on with that? It's everywhere. People love the Pilates. A friend of mine spent thirty bucks on some Pilates stretching rubber. Looked like a big blue rubber band, except it was THIRTY DOLLARS, and had the ability to bring harmony to the body's powerhouse.

Okay, I am going to be a good robot and watch some TV. Just the regular stuff, not war coverage. I do that right before I go to bed to remind myself how big and strong the country is I live in. Shit, I am proud to be an American. We can Shock AND awe.

Final thought...today when I was driving in my car I saw a black bird flying with one of those plastic icee push-up things, you know the tubes filled with flavored syrup that you pop in your freezer...poor kids popsicles. Anyway, the bird had a half filled orange one in its mouth. It was flying quite proudly, too.

I imagined the bird eyeing a small child standing out in her yard, parents standing close by. And just when the parents least expect it, the bird swoops down and steals the popsicle.

Heh heh, as if someone would expect a bird to steal their popsicle. That's just crazy talk.

The bird was smiling like that cat that ate the bird.

Peace.

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