Oh Canada! 06.29.03

It's is difficult to make an entry sometimes, if you're not a Gold Member. I really should just send some money and do it. Maybe I will...or maybe I will procrastinate. Nah, I will procrastinate later.

Very low-key weekend. I just sort of bummed around the house, or hung out with friends. It was pleasant. Pleasant.

I have been striving for 'pleasant.' That is fucking hilarious! What if that is the big joke? You do everything you can, you do all the right things, eventually, and then you are rewarded with pleasantries. Wouldn't that be the powdered sugar topping to this big spinning, expanding universe.

I drove by the Gay Pride shindig at the park, yesterday. I thought about stopping, but I just didn't feel like feeling like part of a group. I would just look around and realize I don't even mesh with those that I am supposed to be most alike. And, believe me, for the most part...I am not.

A lot of it is bullshit, really, because when gay folk get into that 'hive-mind' mentality it gets a bit frightening. I don't know if solidarity is a natural thing. It gets the job done, I suppose, but people melting together to make this uninteresting inclusive mob-beast has always been a bit off-putting for me. I guess I am just not a joiner.

It was colorful, though. So many rainbows and happy gay couples feeling confident enough to hold hands in public. I wonder how many of them continue this when not in Gay Pride Park? I guess, it's cool there are a couple of days where you can wear your love on your sleeve. Best put it under wraps by monday, though. It's time to put the flags back in the closet and get your don't-rock-the-boat pants back on in time for the office on Monday.

I really shouldn't be such a cynic. Things have gotten better. But, there really shouldn't be any big deal in the first place. This whole Homo-phobic thing just doesn't make any sense. People fear the darndest things.

What was it some random comedian said, "I don't get homophobia...People who have a phobia of rats, when they see one, don't have the sudden urge to punch them in the face."

Well, time to get my mind in work-mode. It is going to be another long week. Hell, my life is just going to be a succession of really long weeks. This, this moment, and tomorrow's are going to be the culmination of every moment thus far. That's a lot of responsibility to do something really cool.

Peace.